AH HA! Links of the week

Here are some interesting links for you. From how BP is still going to screw us, to publishing on your own, finding time, finding energy, money and friend philosophies.

Enjoy.

“Corporations aren’t people. They have no brains, no consciences, no capacity for intent or guilt. “

“I’m going to make over $100,000 this year, and a lot of the money is from the books that New York publishers rejected.”

“Turn off Twitter, Anne Lamott says. And don’t clean the house. That’s what it takes to create the rich life you deserve”

A Simple Life Change That Will Help You Live Longer And Happier

Why Money Makes You Unhappy

Want to Live Longer? Get Some Friends

3 Reasons Why I Didn’t Sell My Website

I had an offer to sell my website but decided it was in my best interests not to.

I built this website to provide you with a tool and blog to help you make life changes. The first step to help you make a life change is for you to think about your life as a whole - “Who Am I“, and then link this to your core personal values and finally your goals or habits. By using this method you break your life down from the big picture to small bite sized chunks. If I can help you make one life change, or at least begin to think about making changes then I know my job is done. The blog is from my life experiences and the hundreds of books I have loved and read.

The blog allows me to express myself, search for meaning and purpose AND become a better writer. I love to write. Writing clears my head, provides a forum for my ideas, puts things in perceptive and expands my creativity.  Lately I have been trying to express myself through stories. Stories give me more meaning and I have to live my stories to make them real. The more stories I live, the more memorable a life I have experienced, written and shared.  This goes in parallel with one of the best tips I learnt about writing nonfiction. Express how something “feels”.  Without feelings, nonfiction writing can be robotic and bland.  People relate best to feelings and emotions. And perhaps most of all, writing has helped me open my heart to the world.

The blog helps me overcome my fears. Writing for an audience always brings up a certain fear factor.  You are afraid that you might not have something interesting to say.  You are afraid your writing style is boring. You are afraid your dream of becoming a writer will fail. But as I have gotten over those fears I have overcome times of horrible resistance.  I am a writer. I’m not afraid to call myself that now.

I also believe fear is the cause of many if not all problems. It is the root of negative assumptions and the destructive emotions of anger, jealousy and possessiveness. This is why I’m learning to open my heart and let negative energy flow through without becoming attached to it.

These are three reasons why I did not sell. This website has become part of who I am. At times writing was like swimming through molasses, other times like floating on a cloud. How can I sell that?

Are you living in fear? Have you explored your passion?

Have You Been Creating Memorable Stories With Your Life?

Lately I love writing about creating memories.  The quality of your life is dependent on how you remember it. The quality of your life is a collection of stories interwoven together from a lifetime of memories. When you talk about the stories of your life are you feeling happy or content? Do your stories create sparks of joy? How about when you talk to yourself about your stories? Are you proud about your stories?

Sure you can stand around the water cooler on a Monday morning and talk about the BBQ or recommend what novel you are reading. But what about the stories that make your heart skip? What about the stories that tested your courage?

A friend of mine once gave me a plane ticket to fly to three cities in Europe. I landed in Zurich and was also allowed to fly to Sweden and Finland as well. It was a fabulous gift. I decided to include side trips to Italy and Estonia. A week before leaving, I took out my Let’s Go Europe book, highlighted a few choice youth hostels and took off. When I think back to that experience I’m amazed that in three weeks time I walked, took trains, ferries and flew to some incredible places.

I got lost in Italy at 1: AM searching for my youth hostel, shared my cigarettes with a Russian bus driver (I was the only customer) in Finland, and shared tea in Helsinki with a British art critique and an American improving lives of orphans in Russia. In Sweden I stayed on a 200 foot sailboat and went to a lingerie fashion show (poor me). My courage was tested a few times during that trip, but the memories will last a lifetime.

Staying in and experiencing the present moment is an amazing habit to find peace and even joy, but ultimately the overall quality of our life is governed by our memories and stories . This is your remembered self.

How do you remember yourself? Are you making life changes so that you think back upon your life with happiness and pleasure? What stores stand out in your memory? Are your glued to the Internet and television while the world passes you by?

Maybe it’s time to make new memories, and create a few new stories. There is a whole wide world to explore.

Reference:  Daniel Kahneman - TED - Ideas Worth Spreading

How An Index Card Can Change Your Life

I’ve carried around a 4 x 2 inch index card with the words “Are you being more loving today”, for a few months. By doing so and looking at it many times during the day, I’m creating a constant awareness of this new habit. Most goals or new habits fail because we start off incredibly enthusiastic at first but then fall back into the safety and security of old habits.

My values of peace, joy and even love are being reinforced by this index card. I’m less judgmental, feel more empathy and smile in public more often. When I am waiting in line I do not curse under my breath or demand my change back from a cashier with an outstretched hand and a frown on my face. I approach with a smile, a joke and open heart, and in turn I usually receive a smile back.

By having the words “Are you being more loving today”, carried in my wallet I am becoming more loving in all aspects of my life. I’m calmer and more peaceful in public, at work and with family. I am becoming more of an extrovert and feeling greater compassion.

This technique of writing down a goal or habit on an index card works for anything. Whether you wish to exercise, make new friends, lose weight, stop smoking or feel more joy. It keeps a strong awareness of what you truly wish to change at all times. If you want to exercise more it isn’t always about going to a fancy gym, it may be taking stairs or riding your bike to pick up a DVD. Reading the card reinforces the habit!

I hope you can use My Life Changes as a way to discover your purpose, values and goals in life. Now pick a goal and keep it on you at all times. Look at it many times daily. After a while it will become a part of you and the card can be tossed away. Get rid of those old habits. I dare you to try it, I’m sure you will be amazed.

Reference: The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die

How My iPhone Makes Me Very Happy

I grew up playing pong as a kid. For those of you have no clue what pong is, it is electronic ping pong. It was two paddles and a ball bouncing off the sides of the screen. It was a life changing event. As the electronic blip of a ball would come close to my paddle, my heart would pound and with a deft flick of my wrist I would send it shooting back toward my opponent. Sometimes I would even scream or curse and my friends would cheer wildly. If I won 5 games in a row they would carry me around the house on their shoulders. Ok, that part is not true. Unfortunately, the real ping pong table grew sad and lonely downstairs. Mom would fold her clothes on it.

That was one of my first introductions into the exciting life changing world of technology. Now I have an iPhone attached to my hip and I can re-enact WWII in its entirety during my lunch hour. I also have a ping pong game on it. It looks exactly like a real ping pong table and paddles (the paddles float eerily in the air). It is creepy. But a fun creepy.

Never mind about games. Let me tell how my iPhone really makes me happy.

I listen to self development Audiobooks every morning during my drive to work. I use an accessory to plug my iPhone into the cassette deck and charge it through my lighter. The sound quality is much better than using one of those FM transmitters. Now I avoid the infuriating babble of morning radio Disc Jockeys and listen to something life changing like Pema Chodron –Don’t Bite The Hook.

Listening to audio books makes commercials on the radio disappear. No more nasty loud mouth commercials trying to convince me to buy lottery tickets, MacDonald’s or Britney Spears tickets.

Listening to a good Audiobook like- The Five Secrets Before You Die makes me calm and peaceful in traffic. When a gargantuan SUV blindly cuts me off I concentrate on the words gently flowing out of my speakers instead of tailgating the SUV across town and punching the driver in the head.

Listening to audio books makes a rainy day sunny. Ok that is complete bullshit but I thought it sounded neat when I wrote it.

There are many great uses for an iPhone but this one is my favourite. It helps me stay calm, learn and begin the day on a positive footing.

How do you love your iPhone?

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Related Posts:

An Amazing Yet SImple Life Changing Method.

How To Be Happy And Create A Lifetime Of Joy With Your Memories

Just came back from Ogunquit, Maine. I love it there. I love the quiet beach, eating fresh seafood, breathing in the crisp ocean air and talking amazing walks. Why though? The reason is that I have such warm memories of this place. And my memories tell me a story even before I walk on the beach. My future and the joy I find are largely due to my anticipation based on my memories.

I saw a whale come out of the water a few days ago and that tied in to my memory of seeing dolphin’s many years ago in Wildwood.

These memories and the anticipation that comes with them will last me a lifetime.

I’ve written about living in the now and experiencing the present moment many times. During these times I feel contentment but not necessarily joy.

Joy I find comes from remembering the incredible beauty in the stories of my life. I may have experienced stunning beauty on multiple cliffs or felt the peace and quiet of a hot summer day. I have heard the sound of waves lapping on a shore in many places. These extraordinary memories never get old.

When I think about any of these memories of my life I am truly happy and even joyful at times.

Forget about buying stuff, go out and create a lifetime of wonderful memories. That is what true joy and happiness is all about.

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Stop Complaining, Whining Or Making Lame Excuses And Start Living

I have been working incredibly hard to make meaningful life changes for years. I have changed my fundamental relationship with money (I wanted to be a millionaire by 30).I have settled into two challenging careers and am content with both. I have struggled with back issues but have more or less come to terms with this. I’ve tried to build deeper and more loving ties with family and friends.

We all have life changes we want to make. The biggest life change I’ve made BY FAR is to appreciate the fact that I’ve been given the privilege to live on this blue planet, which slowly twirls around in the middle of an infinite universe. Every single day I think about this. Everything else is insignificant. Lots of money, a powerful career or fame will not bring you a deep joy or heartfelt appreciation. If you think they will you are either incredibly ignorant or our consumer driven society has continued to suck you in and spit you out.

Go take a look up at the sky. It’s going to rain whether you like it. It WILL be cloudy some days (unless you live in Arizona). There is absolutely no point in wishing otherwise. You are just wasting energy and your time hoping for a change that is beyond your control. Learn to enjoy the day and whatever the planet serves up.

The sun will rise and it will set (it only hides behind the clouds). This has not changed since the beginning of time. Enjoy this day because you will never, ever see it again. It is May 09 2010 today. At midnight this day will have passed….forever. Are you going to enjoy it? Or are you going to spend time complaining, whining or making lame excuses?

Sometimes I sit in traffic and fume after some asshole that has cut me off. If he is driving a big Mercedes SUV I may get judgmental and hope something bad happens to him…or her. But in the end these silly incidents don’t matter. I just let it go. What really matters is that I’ve been born onto this beautiful planet and have had a few years to share it with many extraordinary living beings. And even though we are seriously fucking it up with oil spills and raping the forests, I’m eternally grateful for my time here.

I look out at the sky from my car window. I picture this magnificent blue planet circling the sun with a trillion stars winking all around. I remember how damn lucky I am to experience this miracle surrounding me. I feel a deep felt joy. I hope you learn to as well.

Make a life change to enjoy every waking moment you have here. It won’t cost you a cent.

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Related posts:

Choose To Be Happy

Lead A More Meaningful, Peaceful And Happy Life

5 Of The Best Self Development Books

• The Unthethered Soul – the journey beyond yourself.

I discovered this book while reading an article on what some of the worlds Billionaires were reading. This is the best book I’ve read on living in the moment, letting go of useless chatter, opening your heart and channeling positive energy.

• The Millionaire Next Door

One of my favourite best books how to become wealthy. This book is based on facts not fiction. Read more about it here.

• The Pursuit Of Happiness

This is one of my all time favorite books on the subject of Happiness. Another great book backed by facts and excellent research. I wrote a review about it at Amazon.

• The Evolving Self

This book made me begin to think I could help change the world. It was a major influence on my life and how I viewed the world. This book is real eye opener.

• The Mandela Of Being

Another fabulous book on living in the present moment. Once we understand the power of our consciousness the sky is the limit. We discover a peace and joy and let go of living with “me“, “you“, “future“ and the “past“ Also discover gratitude, stillness and presence.

Do you have any favorites?

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A Simple Life Change That Will Help You Live Longer And Happier

Do you feel tired and cranky in the morning? Are you easily irritated? Did you get enough sleep?

The other day I was driving along the bridge and a car changed lanes, unexpectedly cutting me off. No signal and they looked like they OWNED the road. Then it happened again. I cursed out loud and felt my teeth mashing together. I pulled up alongside the driver and had thoughts of stopping, pulling down the window and punching the person in the face. As I pulled up alongside I caught the person happily singing to herself completely oblivious to the traffic and her dangerous driving. I then calmed down, laughed to myself and shrugged my shoulders. Talk about clueless.

Normally I’m a very calm driver, I listen to audio books on my iPhone and watch the world pleasantly roll by. So why did I become enraged? Lack of sleep. When you don’t sleep well it’s easy to get irritated. Your mind feels heavy and your body sluggish. It becomes harder to concentrate and the world just doesn’t seem as calm as when you sleep well. It doesn’t take much to send your brain into a sudden rant and rave.

One of the biggest life changes you can make is to get a decent night’s sleep. Sleep rejuvenates the immune, skeletal, nervous and muscular systems. You wake up refreshed and ready to get on with the day. Decisions are made easier with a calmer and rejuvenated mind. According to Wikipedia and a large scale study on sleep, people who live the longest reported on 6 -7 hours of sleep a night. A pretty simple life change and one you can begin to make today!

Are you getting enough sleep? Let’s make that life change today!

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5 Tips To Create Your Best Life For 2010

Happy belated Christmas and all the Best in the New Year!

You are about to find out my best life changing lessons not only from 2009 but also from hundreds books, blogs and tweets over the past few years. These methods are useful, helpful and are here to solve your problems.

• Defining your core values and living by them RIGHT NOW is possible. If you define freedom as a core value you can step out of worrying about the future and live in the present moment right away. Just stepping outside and looking up at the sky can be an amazing experience. These simple moments can bring perspective to what’s important really important to you. I take in the morning sky every day before hopping in the car. We live an amazing and free life if we choose to!
• Using an index card to create awareness of a new habit IS one of the best life changing tools you can use. Define your values you wish to live by and write down a goal on an index card. Carry that card with you and look at it 20 times a day if you have to. The message may be “Create healthier body “or “Am I being a loving person today?” These messages create a continuous awareness deep inside you. Look at that card often until you live your new habit every day.
• Live in the moment. Living in the moment and not dwelling in the past or future is one of the best life lessons I have learnt this past year. Living in the now will enrich each moment of your my life as worries fade away and you learn to enjoy the simpler things in life.
• Let go of money worries and live a life of freedom and happiness. Why cannot we be happy right now? Isn’t happiness just a choice? Isn’t happiness just a conscience decision? Of course it is. You can choose to be happy or miserable today. You can get up in the morning and embrace the new day or let your worries take over. Money has nothing to do with it. It’s all in the mind.
• Step out of your emotions, worries, fear and stress. Open your heart to living the best life you can right now. When you close your heart your mind closes and all kinds of worry creep in. Keeping an open heart gives your endless energy and allows you to be a loving person. It isn’t about an emotional love but choosing to be a loving person. When you choose this path people will choose to treat you with kindness and compassion as well! Isn`t this life you want to experience?

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