FREE. The Best Kept Goal Setting Secret EVER!

Get your friend to ask you questions. That’s it.

Ok, let me explain. You have written down your goals. Now you need to find a great way to keep on top of them. You absolutely need to FOLLOW UP!

You are all psyched to lose weight, save money or have less stress in your life.

Here is what you need to do. Find a good friend that will ask you a set of 5-10 questions each night that are relevant to your goals. Then have them phone you every night and ask you the questions. They in a sense become a great life coach for you. To make it fair, do the same thing for them. An example of questions might be.

Did you at eat foods filled with sugar today?

How long did you walk today?

How much time did you spend writing today?

How many minutes did you waste today on something that adds 0 value to your life?

How much money did you spend on stuff you really don’t need today?

If you get sick and tired of the questions then GREAT! That means you will want to make a change. Once you begin changing the questions get much easier to answer.

So think about. The main cause that we fail at our goals is lack of follow up. Right? Right.

Now go find that friend (or coach) that will follow up with you. It’s a simple solution to the biggest reason why we fail at our goals.

Why My Brain Loves My Visa Card

As you know I’m making a huge effort to save more money and lose weight. Here is what I’m learning about saving money.

Don’t buy stuff. Don’t even go to stores. Stores are wonderfully set up to affect the emotional part of your mind.

I’ve written a few times about the emotional mind fighting the rational mind. And my solution is to shape the world around you (avoid shopping). That way your emotional mind is completely taken out of the equation.

The problem is that the emotional mind wins more often than it should. Let’s look at how Costco stores are set up. Whenever I walk into a Costco store there are beautiful flat screen televisions when you first walk in.

My first thought is “It would be great to have a second plasma TV in the bedroom. And it would only be a small one, so only $899!”

As I round the second corner there is always a display case of beautiful watches and jewellery.  I love to look at the luxury watches at great prices. Good thing I’ve learnt not to buy watches.

But the flat screen TV thought I have, comes up every time I step into a Costco.

If I bought the TV It would be a purely emotional purchase.  My rational mind (don’t need a second TV and I don’t have the cash) would severely lose out.

The good thing is that I don’t make these Costco purchases. But…

But I did buy a beautiful Hugo Boss lamb skin jacket the other month. It was marked down from $1500 to $1000 to $262. Did I need this jacket? Noooo. Was it purely an emotional purchase? Of course it was. My prefrontal cortex lost all rational reasoning. AND I used my Visa card. AND I bought a couple of lovely polo shirts. Total bill for one jacket and two polo shirts was around $400.

Whenever we consider buying anything (even cereal) it is a tug of war in between the emotional and rational sides.  That cereal is very expensive but I love it AND it’s healthy.

So the lesson here is to be very aware of what triggers you to purchase something. And be especially conscious of your financial situation. And also be aware that using a Visa card is much, much less painful than having to go out and withdraw $400 cash AND hand it over for a jacket and two summer tops.

Using a Visa card is much more abstract to the brain then using cash.

This is how my brain works. I much more aware now.   What do I do with my Visa card?

Advise To People That Don’t Lose Weight Or Never Get Wealthy

Aright! In my last post I wrote I about losing weight and get rid of some small debts.

I would love for you to follow me on this journey. I promise to inspire and motivate you.

I now weigh 210 pounds (mind you I carry this weight really well) and would like to go down to 190.

I have about 4600 dollars in silly debt which I will eliminate ASAP, but I will also create an emergency fund AND I would like to buy a second house in Florida. Woot!

Not too difficult right?

As someone who writes regularly about making life changes should be a piece of cake.   Right?

Let’ see how it goes.

I’ll give you a glimpse of what’s working and what isn’t.

So come along for the ride. I’ll be using the tracker and all the My Life Changes tools available to help me.

And if all else fails it will be time to make THE PLEDGE!!

THE PLEDGE is all tested and ready to go.

DO you need a pledge? Think about it.

Admit it ….you do.

How I Started A New Life With One Hour

There are 24 hours in a day. Once those 24 hours are up, that day will be gone forever. Then a new one starts all over. Then it is gone forever too. How are you spending each day?

The burning question is how do you spend your 24 hours? During the week, we may have 7 hours to sleep,8 hours for work, 1 -2  hours for various and traffic, 2 hours for meals. This leaves us with about 6 hours. Let’s say we exercise for 1 hour and if we have a family, 3 hours with them.

We still have about 2 hours left over.

1-2 hours to start your dream.

1-2 hours to begin your blog.

1-2 hours to meditate and relieve your stress.

1-2 hours to read self development and expand your mind.

I spend 1 hour a day on this website, writing, editing, modifying, creating and finding incredible meaning and purpose.

What is stopping you from planting the seeds of the dream life you always imagined? Why aren’t you spending an hour a day on what YOU love? Why are you giving 8 hours to a corporation and leave nothing for yourself?

It’s time to stop screwing around, wasting your time and make the life changes you want right now.

There is absolutely no excuse.

I Always Failed At Goal Setting – So I Started Reading My Life Changes

One of the key rules of great goal setting is to be specific. People may have read about this a dozen times, but they still continue to set vague goals. Let’s explain the problem with this.

If you set a goal to paint the spare room (because it will look fabulicious painted) it’s easy to set this vague goal. “Paint the spare room”

However, if you are specific and write down – I will paint the spare bedroom on Saturday morning, May 28 …well now you have set aside a time and date which further commits you to take action. Now you know that this date is for beautifying the spare room and not golfing, shopping ,snoozing, web surfing or TV.

This rule especially applies to business. If you have a large project to execute and people are counting on you, you break the project into smaller specific goals and commit to a date for each one. Or else the project will be a miserable failure.

So why shouldn’t you apply the same rules to your personal life? Your goals in your personal life are even more important.

Be specific. Commit to a date and a time.

When I designed this website I used the tracker here in its beta form and broke down each step in order to create the website. It took a few months but if I had not set specific goals and timelines this fabulous website would not exist.  : )  There had to be a business plan, design, programming, testing and support.

Now it’s your turn.  What fabulous goals or habits do you want to create in your life? What steps are required and by what date are you ready to commit yourself to?

Let’s do it.

Top 5 Goal Setting Tips

Be specific in your goals!

Study after study has proven the fact that creating and visualizing specific goals is much more motivating than vague ones. Lose 5 pounds next month is much clearer than” lose some weight”. Also a goal like “Paint the spare room on May 1^st” is not only more specific but makes you clear your calendar for that day.

Relate your goals to your amount of self control and your top priorities.

In the book Succeed by Heidi Grant Halvorson she mentions the fact that Barack Obama is having a hard time smoking and Oprah has a hard time staying thin.  The point is that we all have only so much self control. Oprah admits that her life is out of balance and that affects her weight.  I want to create another web site related to my business and IT expertise but when I get home I’m usually drained.  Decide where you will apply your self control because we all run out of steam. Our self control gets tired like a muscle being over trained and then our goals fail. What is your priority in life? What are your main goals? Maybe you can’t do them all.

Shape the world around you to reach your goals!

Our will power and goals are largely driven by our rational and emotional minds.  Our rational mind understands the positive effects of healthy eating habits and living a long life. Our emotional mind loves greasy or sweet foods that make us immediately happier during a miserable day.  To avoid using the mind shape the world around you. Do not buy sweets or greasy foods and bring them into the house. Have your money automatically go into a retirement account. Make it so you take away as much mind temptation as possible.  Shape the world around you.

Your habits rule 90% of your goals.

I eat 2 fruits and a small yogurt at 10:00 in the morning every work day. This is a very healthy snack and allows me to get in my daily fruit and avoid vending machines at work. To do this I shop at a fruit and vegetable market every Sunday morning. These are habits I’ve incorporated into my daily and weekly routines. If you set a life changing goal it will most likely create a life changing habit. Thus, losing weight, saving money, reducing weight or living your dream life will mean changing lifelong habits.  Decide what goals will turn into automatic habits and stick to them. Or you will fail over and over.  Decide on a couple of mini goals today! They will turn into great lifelong habits.

If you always fail at your goals get your ass kicked hard.

This website provides tools, tips and articles to help you make life changes. But I know from looking at statistics that most of you come in for a few minutes and then leave.  I’ve mentioned here that the $4.95 a month deluxe version of My Life Changes is cheaper than a MacDonald’s Happy Meal!  And this site has a ton of life changing information! But some of you prefer to pound back more hamburgers or cry in your mountain of debt.  It’s hard for me to kick your ass from here. So hire a coach. Why do you think Jillian Michaels of The Biggest Loser or Gordon Ramsey of Hell’s Kitchen are able to motivate people to lose huge amounts of weight or become world class chefs? Because they kick peoples ass and take them out of their comfort zone.  They make people realize their toughest goals can be met. Often they make people cry. Are you going to run to MacDonald’s now or cry in your bills again? Or are you going to do something about it? If not, go hire someone to kick you in the ass really hard.  You will need it.

How An Index Card Can Change Your Life

I’ve carried around a 4 x 2 inch index card with the words “Are you being more loving today”, for a few months. By doing so and looking at it many times during the day, I’m creating a constant awareness of this new habit. Most goals or new habits fail because we start off incredibly enthusiastic at first but then fall back into the safety and security of old habits.

My values of peace, joy and even love are being reinforced by this index card. I’m less judgmental, feel more empathy and smile in public more often. When I am waiting in line I do not curse under my breath or demand my change back from a cashier with an outstretched hand and a frown on my face. I approach with a smile, a joke and open heart, and in turn I usually receive a smile back.

By having the words “Are you being more loving today”, carried in my wallet I am becoming more loving in all aspects of my life. I’m calmer and more peaceful in public, at work and with family. I am becoming more of an extrovert and feeling greater compassion.

This technique of writing down a goal or habit on an index card works for anything. Whether you wish to exercise, make new friends, lose weight, stop smoking or feel more joy. It keeps a strong awareness of what you truly wish to change at all times. If you want to exercise more it isn’t always about going to a fancy gym, it may be taking stairs or riding your bike to pick up a DVD. Reading the card reinforces the habit!

I hope you can use My Life Changes as a way to discover your purpose, values and goals in life. Now pick a goal and keep it on you at all times. Look at it many times daily. After a while it will become a part of you and the card can be tossed away. Get rid of those old habits. I dare you to try it, I’m sure you will be amazed.

Reference: The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die

An Amazing Yet Simple Life Changing Lesson

I’ve taken a bit of a break from writing (for health reasons) but am back in the saddle (but writing from bed, so no real saddle), and would love to share a major life changing method. This method will now be the cornerstone for me (hopefully for you) and a perfect addition to the website tools. Ready?

Use a 6 x 4 Note card to break or create a new habit or goal

Once you have defined your goals using the tracker, choose one goal and write it down on an index card.

Writing your goal down on an index card and carrying it with you at all times creates a solid awareness of the change you want to make. This awareness of your goal will be strongly reinforced if you pull out the card many times during the day. Make yourself pay attention to your goal. It will remind you of how important the goal is to you. The statement on the card may be as simple as these examples.

• Get more exercise and be physically fit.
• Stop smoking, feel better and save money
• Be more loving

Getting more exercise doesn’t just mean just joining a gym. It means taking a walk. Taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Walking the dog. Riding the bike. The note card should be pulled out whenever you have the urge to fall back into a bad habit or routine.

Being more loving can apply to family members or the cashier at grocery store. Pull that note out and you are suddenly aware that you can be a more loving person. Who knows, it may even help you find love!

Once the behavior is now a habit, you just throw the note card away (or keep it for sentimental reasons).

So you don’t need an iPhone to make a major change. All you need is to take your time defining your goals and then a simple index card to create a steady awareness of that goal or habit.

I can’t think of a better method and it works great for me!

Related Posts:

How To Quit A Bad Habit Using An Index Card

How To Overcome Addiction

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The Importance Of Personal Value Based Goal Setting

I came across an excellent article about setting goals according to your values. Completely inline with my philosophy and www.mylifechanges.com Thank you Stephen!

A Values-Based Approach to Goals

Here’s How To Make Life Changes

I created www.mylifechanges.com to help you make meaningful life changes. I can’t force you to make life changes. Only you can decide that. I have supplied a tool for you to use. I could become your personal coach but you probably can not afford a life coach. I hope you decide to make life changes today, because tragedy can strike at any time, and by then it may be far too late. This website will make you think. Thinking is good.

Decide who you are

First, you will need to decide who you are. Are you a parent, entrepreneur and athlete? Or are you a philosopher, businessman and wealth builder? Understanding your own big picture will set the frame for the next steps.

Decide what your core values are

Here are the top 5 core values (in order) people are seeking on www.mylifechanges.com: balance, achievement, commitment, love, and happiness. I don’t think it is necessary to list more then 5 core values. I also think that happiness is a very good core value to seek. Without happiness is life really much fun? Now you are ready to set goals according to who you are and what core values are meaningful to you.

Decide what your goals are

Take your most important core value and set a goal that will help you live accordingly to it. If your value is happiness, your goal may be to start the morning off with a smile. It’s simple but goals don’t have to be complicated to have a huge effect. Don’t set too many goals. It will be too difficult to reach a bunch at the same time. Kind of hard to quit smoking, lose weight and meditate all at the same time. You have taken perhaps the three most important steps in your life.

Track your changes

Use the color coded tracker to see how you are doing. I made the tracker as visual and simple as possible to make it easy for you and I. You are now on your way to making life changes. Congratulations!

Is it that simple? Yes it is. Why should it be complicated? You have a need, I supply a tool, you take action.

If you enjoyed this post today, do me a favor and use the “tweet’ button down below (click on the + sign) to share it with your Twitter friends and followers (You can also share it on Facebook, Digg, or any of the other sites you see below as well).

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